Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Gloria Estefan and Fiber

My sweet baby girl has struggled with the ability to poop since, oh, the day she was born. It didn't matter what we fed her, be it breast milk or ready-pour concrete mix, she would get backed up. For months and months, we have carefully monitored her diet to avoid giving her too many rice or banana products. We have administered servings of flax oil, corn syrup, and whatever miracle concoction we could find. We have swayed and cheered and begged for poop. All to no avail. We have had to Fleet 'er up many times; and the only solution that works consistently is two ounces of prune juice nightly.

This morning found her poop a day late. I braced myself for what was to come. And just like always, she walked in carrying socks (her favorite toy), wailing and making the familiar Disaster Poop face. I held her and rocked her and smoothed her hair as she pushed with all her might. She grimaced and shook, and I felt entirely small and powerless in the wake of stubborn feces. So I did what I could and shushed her and told her it would be ok, and she continued to grunt and shake.

And then there was a beautiful moment. In the midst of her rectal turmoil, a song came on the television. And while she was pushing so hard she reminded me of a pressure cooker, she still could not resist the inner call to get her groove on. So she sat there grunting and bent over, shaking her shoulders and booty while nodding her head to the beat.

The rhythm got her, indeed. Thank you, Elmo.


Chuck said...

aw who would have thought we'd be indebted to elmo...

Mike Adamick said...

That has to be the best post on poop ever. Wonderful.
Mike at Cry it out

Sara Schaefer Munoz said...

Hi Jennifer,

My name is Sara Schaefer Munoz, I'm a reporter at The Wall Street Journal, and I'm looking into a story about people who have buried a St. Joseph statue in their yard to help sell their homes - an emerging trend. I saw in a post from you on another blog and clicked through to your site. I'd love to talk to you more about why you did this and if it helped sell your home.
I can be reached at 212-416-3057 or at sara.munoz@wsj.com
Hope to hear from you soon.